There is no such thing as talent, there is pressure?

This year in college is so stressful & exhausting, I finished Gynaecology, Burn & Surgery round, Internal, Chest & Geriatrics round and now I'm having my Orthopedics round final exams, so basically I'm studying non-stop since last September except for 2 weeks vacation after each round which is too much pressure for me to bear, I no longer have the energy to study & excel in the coming exams, I became completely apathetic towards exams for the first time in my life! I've always feared & hate to fail, to not live up to my or my parents' expectations which increased my primary fear of losing control over my life and which also made me a perfectionist & a control freak!

Sometimes I believe that this fear is because of having a pushy parents(or a mother in my case since I don't have a father figure after all!) who constantly push me towards perfection in the utterly trivial thing I do, always putting pressure on me to excel in school, relationships & religion, but it is too much, they don't understand that they never learned how to deal with their own failures so they pass their unrealistic expectations on to me unconsciously & it is simple psychology, really. It's called transference.
Maybe they are excused about that; already the pressures of being a parent are equal to any pressure on earth, to be a conscious parent, and really look to that little being's mental & physical health, is a responsibility which most of people, including my parents, avoid most of the time because it's too hard.

In the process of all of that, they weren't aware how pressure affected me when I first dealt with my homosexuality when I was 14 or 15 which(homosexuality) already put me under the same pressure as adults and maybe more! What kind of childhood is that? When you are all by yourself in front of Society's & Religion's constant pressure? How was I supposed to feel when society rejects me & all religions curse me? I definitely got into the famous "Sexuality vs Religion's guilt" phase, but thanks God I was strong enough and didn't give up, I started to read more and more about my religions to know the truth and assurance and I found that it is mostly about various pictures & how you perceive and interpret them, I figured out that religions were a very beautiful and mature attempts to approach the ideology and definition of higher power or God and I really believe that there is a higher power and that I wouldn't get punished for something I didn't choose.
But it took me a huge effort to get over many pictures I perceived, to get over the idea of sins & punishment, to get over the pressure that men of religions put on the people since ages to sustain their beliefs and to improve their delivery of the policy and their delivery of the ideas so that they can garner support for whatever principle they're articulating!
Some readings in Atheism & Agnosticism also helped me a bit and made it easier for me to understand more, but I believe that Albert Einstein was right when he said that It would be possible to describe everything scientifically, but it would make no sense; it would be without meaning, as if you described a Beethoven symphony as a variation of wave pressure.

However, by time, tears stopped to be the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it, I learned how to deal with pressures, how to get tough and work over pressure not under it, how not to feel any pressure and to just try to stay calm, follow my plans and try not to overthrown.
Maybe that's why I'm always so quiet, I seem to people that I'm in control even when I'm not, I became some sort of ticking time bomb that sooner or later will explode especially if you are in an environment where you feel you can't fail!
But for my very good luck, I explode every now & then or I would have went insane when I get in control in front of all the pressures I face daily, especially the religious ones, when my mum never fails to wake me up for Friday's prayers, when you over hear preachers on TV talking about torture and bluish your life with their dusty language, when the instructor in your college is an Islamist who preaches for 15 minutes prior and post classes, when you photocopy the handbook of past examinations which is made by Muslims Brotherhood's students union and you find a provocative quote in every corner of each page, when you find "Veil before Hell" and similar bumper stickers on the walls of your college, your building & even your elevator, when you get into a sterile conversation with a colleague of yours because you find it totally stupid of her to choose to join a medical school even though she wears Niqab and chooses not to to touch any male patient even if he was an 80 years old with broken leg & wouldn't possibly lure her in any mean, when you talk with a 28 years old gay guy who still believes that homosexuality is a plague and the act of it vibrates God's holy chair!

These were just simple examples of the religious pressures and you don't really want to get me started on Society's and other pressures!