Kelesetan: humor

Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts

Curious pre-teen boy in red jacket sneaks a peak at some busty cleavage and gets busted in the act

I don’t know who the boy is or the pretty blonde holding the microphone. I don’t even know what country this took place other than it sounds like the speaker is speaking French.

But I do know this. That’s a normal young man.

Video (h/t) AOL

Crazy White people playing in Times Square during Hurricane Irene

This is the only time you will hear me pull the race card. You’d have to be a member of a minority group like myself to get it though. It’s a common joke in the ‘hood whenever you hear about somebody doing something crazy or out-the-ordinary, chances are that person is gonna be white.

Case in point. A man and a woman are frocking around Times Square sliding into puddles like little children. But, these are grown ups and it’s a very good chance they’ve had something to drink. These are the kinda crazy things white people do.

Photos from Daily Mail

MSNBC officially give racial pimp/ghetto king/charlatan activist Rev Al “I’ll pull the race card in a minute” Sharpton his own show

The low ratings giant MSNBC has added to their stellar list of on air talent.

Sharpton, who first made his bones on the national scene over 20 year ago with the Twana Brawley false rape allegation case, and has since spent his time shaking down corporations with fake boycotts that mysteriously go away with a contribution to his National Action Network.

Of course his experience as a quasi-leader in the black community gives him the perfect credentials to be a host of cable show, right?

IF CNN could hire former whoremonger and ex NY Gove Elliott “Client # 9” Spitzer, then Al deserves a shot too.

Who else is better at keeping the brothers and sisters in the ‘hood voting Democrat, than Sharpton?

Look! There goes a racists Tea Party member!

How hard is that?

The Blaze

MSNBC has named the Rev. Al Sharpton as host of a weeknight program on the network. Tuesday’s announcement comes after the civil rights activist spent several weeks as a tryout in the 6 p.m. Eastern time slot. Apparently MSNBC executives were satisfied with Rev. Sharpton’s performance.

Yeah, that’s a professional alright.

BUMPED-Exclusive: Obama calls Chris Matthews and Al Sharpton to secret WH meeting on how to deal with the Perry Problem

The Last Tradition has obtained a transcript of a top secret meeting between President Obama, Chris Matthews and Al Sharpton on how to handle Texas Gov Rick Perry entrance to the GOP run for president.

President Obama: God damn it, Chris! You told me Perry wasn’t going to run.

Chris Matthews: I tried to tell you Mr. President. But, you don’t answer your cell while you’re playing golf.

President Obama: Oh, so you think I play too much golf too?

Matthews: I didn’t say that Mr. President. My, that’s a very sharp crease you have in your pants, Mr. President.

Obama: What are you David Brooks now? Let’s focus Chris. What are we gonna do about Perry. This guy can kick my ass!

Al Sharpton: Mr. President?

Obama: Al? Don’t you see I’m talking to Chris right now?

Sharpton: Yeah, but….

Obama: Shut up, Al. I’ll get to you in a minute. What do we do, Chris?

Matthews: Let’s see, what can we do? Oh, I got it. I’ll call him crazy on my show.

Obama: Crazy huh?

Matthews: That’s it, Mr. President. I’ll call him crazy on my show, and Al can call him a racist on his show.

Obama: Hmm. Crazy and a racist?

Sharpton: But, Mr. Preesident?

Obama: Al? I’m still talking to Chris remember?

Matthews: I think that’s a winner Mr. President.

Obama: That sounds good, Chris. Maybe you can throw in some Confederate flag stuff. That always works on the Negros.

Sharpton: Negros? Mr. President! You’re black.

Obama: That’s for the campaign trail. I’m half white God dam it

Michelle Obama: It’s time for your 5th prayer of the day.

Obama: Oh, that’s right. Where’s my prayer rug?

Mrs. Obama: Where you always leave it, next to the statue of Mao Tse-tung.

Obama: Oh thanks, Honey. Okay that settles it. Chris, you get on MSNBC and call Perry crazy till the cows come home. And Al, call him a racist. That should be simple enough for you to understand because that’s all you do anyway.

Sharpton: Yes, Mr. President

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Happy 235th, America

And don't anybody worry out there- we'll get through this vile Obammunist era and come backstronger than ever. Pulling ourselves up by the bootstraps is what this country is all about,and that's just what the situation calls for.

I look at it as just another chance to shine, and shine we will- striving to be that city on a hill that Reagan spoke of...

May God Bless the United States of America: